Word to your mother!

Ran across these extremely helpful Microsoft Word tips by romance author Monica Burns. Monica instructs you how to create a macro for repetitive words. I did this yesterday and it wasn't hard. The macro then searches for a word you specify and highlights its usage. It can be quite sobering to scroll through a document and see such passive words as saw, heard and felt highlighted again and again. There's also a macro to reverse the highlights, so be sure to install that one too.

Monica also has instructions for making your own ARC (advanced reading copy). Very helpful. She provides instructions for .doc, .rtf, and .pdf formats.

I found the macros easy to do and I got it right the first time. Give it a try!

Who’s aFREYd of telling the truth?

I can't believe I haven't posted since Monday. I meant to, but somehow got sidetracked. First, there was the SASE brouhaha between Miss Snark and Joe Konrath (search for SASE in both blogs since there was more than one post). Then there was the whole James Frey thing, which really just pisses me off. He LIED. Why all the dissembling about what memoirs mean and what's really lying anyway and oh it's mostly true and blah blah blah when the book says non-fiction on the spine? Non-fiction means to me that what is contained within these pages is as close to the truth as it can be (taking into consideration that memories are inherently faulty). Oprah touted this book as a lifesaving heartwarming true story of pulling oneself up by the bootstraps.

But saying you spent three months in jail where you bonded with an illiterate murderer and helped him appreciate Tolstoy when you really only spent 5 hours in lockup (and never even got near a murderer or Tolstoy) is WRONG. And Oprah defending him on Larry King disappoints me more than I can say. She says the controverys is “much ado about nothing” when she ought to be saying, Hey, I'm as disappointed as you are. I was moved by the book, but I wish I'd known what was true and what wasn't before I recommended it to others.

The almighty dollar rules, however. And I'm not saying I'm so naive that I don't realize the American public gets fed lies on a daily basis and keeps asking for more. Reality shows aren't all that real after all. They're scripted. Doesn't stop people from wanting them. We like the drama of seeing people under pressure. We also like underdog stories. We want to see Everyman (or woman) triumph. We want to hoist them on our backs and parade them around the forum huzzahing the whole way, because if they can do it, anyone can do it. We reward them with our admiration and our dollars. The incentive for mischief in pursuit of that reward is inherent, especially as our need for the triumphant Everyman erodes our necessity for proof positive.

Glad I write fiction. But maybe I should consider a memoir. I did spend an afternoon in jail once. Of course, it was a tour and I was about 14, but I'm sure I can beef that part up a bit. I had a boyfriend that got arrested once. Does that count?

Persistence is the Key

From the same comments trail of Joe Konrath's blog comes this comment by e.c. morgan, who once worked as an editor at an automotive magazine:

Persistence is important in this business. I remember one writer who sent me query after query. I'd reject one and he'd immediately send another. All were well written, very professionally done — he was just barely missing the mark. Finally, after about a dozen rejections, I sent an assignment for a different story back with the rejection slip (his query was similar to a story we already had in the works). Seven years later, when I look at that magazine at the store, I still see his name in there.

Never, never, never give up (to paraphrase old Sir Winston). 🙂

Words of Wisdom

I'm sitting here trying to figure out, for the millionth time in my life, what the heck I have to do to make this book I'm working on be the ONE that sells. I think I know, and then I get sidetracked. Let me explain.

No matter how many times I read this stuff about hooks, I still can't manage to stick with a plan once I start writing a book. I know what a hook is. I know how to write an opening hook (I once won a Happy Hooker contest–what fun using that in a query letter!). My problem is getting the plot hook for the book and then sticking with it. I like to change things. A lot. I toss in the proverbial kitchen sink. I end up cutting. I change the sink from stainless to marble. Then I decide granite is better. But oh, maybe that porcelain farmhouse sink. Wait, what about that Tuscan stone basin? Oh shoot, doesn't Villeroy and Boch make lovely hand-painted wash basins?

See?

But today, I read something that made a LOT of sense. Joe Konrath says in the comments section of a post: “If a book is poorly written, but has a great hook, it has a much better chance of selling than a well written book with no hook at all.This is a business. Books are a product. The sizzle sells the steak.”

Whoa. So I really do have to get the hook and stick with it. Think sizzle. Think steak. (But not too much, because there goes the New Year's diet….) And I already knew this, but I'd never heard it explained quite like that before. Maybe food metaphors are the key to enlightenment. 🙂

Rejection Collection

A good site to surf to on occasion is rejectioncollection.com. In fact, the site's founder, Catherine Wald, has written a book:
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When you're feeling down, go read about rejection. In fact, here's a tale from the website….

In 1996 I thought about giving up my dream of becoming a published author. I had written two novels, found a wonderful agent and, by her account, had the best rejection letters any writer could wish for.

[…]

But despite them all… or to spite them all – I'm not sure which – I took to the web.

[…]

About 16 months after my web site went live, in February of 1999, Lip Service – the little book that could – was discovered on line by an editor at the Doubleday Book Club who bought it as an alternate book club selection. It was the first time a major book club had bought a self-published novel. The first time a book had been discovered online.

Two weeks after that Pocket Books offered my agent a contract. At that point Lip Service became the first e-book to cross over to become a mainstream novel.Lip Service – the book no one wanted in 1996 – has now sold over 60,000 copies and has been published in England, Germany, Israel, The Netherlands, France and Australia. The trade paperback version has just gone into a second printing.

If you don't know by now, the author is M. J. Rose. 🙂 Good thing she didn't give up. And neither should you.

Curing the Meh

Periodically, I go back and reread some of the articles/posts/websites that have helped me the most in my quest to improve my writing. Today, I clicked on Holly Lisle's A Baker's Dozen Antidotes to Meh Writing. Don't know what meh writing is? Here's an explanation from an editor at Red Pen Diaries:

The meh. This is the category where I receive the most submissions. This person has done their homework. The cover letter is pristine, the synopsis excellent, nary a typo to be found in the submission as a whole. Just one problem. While the author wasn't looking, someone sucked the immortal soul out of the book. The voice is non-existent. The plot? Blah and bland with a side of meh. Outwardly, there is nothing wrong with the submission, it is spit n' polished to a glossy sheen. Inwardly? A cold gelid, slimy piece of bologna on slightly doughy, moist Wonder bread.

A little known secret? Meh's are often published. Meh's often get picked by new or inexperienced publishers, or even established ones in a moment of weakness. Why? Meh's know their craft. The book seems to need little or no work, and the meh's are pleasant and easy to deal with. Of course, the editor doesn't often realize they have signed a meh, until they begin the editing process. Then, the passion they have for editing doesn't seem as strong for this particular title — they dilly-dally around with other things instead of completing their edit. The realization is often gradual — but sooner or later, the editorial light bulb will go off. Dammit! I signed a meh!

Luckily, I got my meh experience veery early on in my editing career (with an author I no longer edit — so calm down everyone!) through a “present” bequeathed me from another editor (who I still want to kick most fiercely whenever I see her!). This editor quickly realized she had a meh on her hands and passed her on to the new kid. I had the misfortune to accept her next heartbreaking work of meh genius. Never. Again. I am glad I learned my meh lesson early, because meh's are hard to get rid of. Rejecting a meh is like kicking a puppy. These people are genuinely trying — they have learned their craft inside and out. Unfortunately they were either born with voice imodulation disorder, or they had their unique author's voice beaten out of them by the endless speakers, critique groups, books, or conventions they went to in search of the magic bullet to publishing. There is almost nothing constructive you can say to a meh — they ARE doing most everything right, and the one thing they are not doing is virtually unteachable. I feel sorry for the meh's. But now all they will get from me is a kind (is there such a thing?) yet bland and non-descript rejection letter.

Oh dear, right? And you know what is the scariest part? “…they had their unique author's voice beaten out of them by the endless speakers, critique groups, books, or conventions they went to in search of the magic bullet to publishing.” Sort of like the discussion on some of the lit blogs about MFAs and the deadening of Voice. Having your voice beat out of you is a real danger. How do you avoid it? Damned if I know.

All I know is that you have to be careful when listening to others tell you how to write, even when those others are multi-published. Their way isn't necessarily your way. Of course you should listen to them on many things, because they've been in the trenches and they know what they're talking about. But don't let it mess with your unique voice. Don't let someone tell you that you can't have a werewolf/shapeshifter/cop hero because those don't sell if that's what you REALLY want to write. Write it and give it a shot, being fully aware they may be right.

Setting is one I used to hear all the time. Don't set your historical in ancient Rome or medieval Germany, etc. I've also heard not to use Hawaii as a setting, though Carol Burnside (hi, Carol!) recently won the Maggie Award for her unpublished short contemporary set in Hawaii. Like Miss Snark says, writing trumps everything. If you do it well enough, maybe you'll convince an editor to take a chance on you. You might even start a trend.

Local author Morag McKendrick Pippin is having great success with a trilogy of romance thrillers set in the early 20th century (India, Britain, and Germany for pete's sake!). The first book, Blood Moon Over Bengal, won the Holt Medallion for Best First Book last year. (Go look at the cover, and then go look at Blood Moon Over Britain–they are gorgeous!) It can be done.

So learn what meh writing is and go read Holly's tips for fixing it.

Aloha.